I told T I was going to write this blog after witnessing what she went through during the labor process. I was very busy with school after Camo was born so I never had the time. Now that I'm out of school for two weeks I'd like to relate to you what I experienced during the labor.
I'm not sure how many of you have ever witnessed a natural birth before. Natural meaning, no drugs...period! Not ever Advil or Tylenol. I'd never seen a live delivery before let alone a natural one.
I was in for a treat!
When T and I got married she would often talk about her fear of labor and delivery. She would tell me that she couldn't handle pain very well and would describe how pain she had felt in the past would make her almost pass out. I believed her and was surprised when she told me she wanted to do a natural birth. I was all for doing whatever she wanted and if that was the course she was going to take and was going to encourage her to keep that goal even during the worst of labor pain. I also prepared myself for a long day of having my hand squeezed off and my head chewed off during the labor. If there was no drugs for T, I was sure I would need some for myself.
Then labor hit.
T was having a rough night trying to sleep and I had an exam the next day so I told her I was going to go sleep on the couch to make sure I got enough sleep before my exam. In the morning when my alarm went off at 6 AM I opened my eyes and saw her standing right in front of me. "I think I'm in labor." she said calmly and relaxed. My response, "No you're not." (stupid, I know) She went on to explain that she was up all night with her mom on the phone and had been timing her contractions. As she continued to explain the situation I began to realize that this was it, we were most likely going to have a baby by the end of the day. But then my own anxiety had snuck up on me knowing what we were about to face...without any drugs.
By the time we had arrived at the hospital the contractions were coming on harder and faster. When T got hooked up to all the monitors there was no doubt that she was in labor. I thought to myself, "I better saddle up because it was about to to get bad."
And it did, but not nearly as bad as I thought. T was a champion, you could tell each contraction was painful but with each approaching one T took it on and breathed through it. It was remarkable to watch her in action. I have never seen as much strength, as much determination, or as much perseverance in my entire life. And from the person who in our entire marriage told me she was not good at dealing with pain. If that was the case, then T became a different women then she was previous to the labor; she had become someone able to cope. She had become inspired and in the process inspired everyone else in the room.
After it was all over I promised her I was going to treat her like the inspiring women she had become. As you can probably guess I have already fallen short...many time over. It's funny how quickly your mind can forget the things that take your breath away. Maybe that is why I have not been able to write this blog until now. It has given me the desperate reminder I needed. Though sometimes my actions don't always show it, I will never forget what I saw and felt during the labor and delivery of our son. T is the most incredible women I know and my respect for all women has increased. I hope she never forgets how much I love her and what she means to this family. Without her, Camo and I wouldn't be the men we are.
